I Have No Idea Where to Post Anymore

1/19/2019

Do I even have an LJ anymore? I feel like that might be something gone from inactivity. Fifteen years’ worth of off and on again journaling might be gone. Oh well. Tumblr is a massive mess. Plus, I kind of just reblog random, unimportant junk on there more than anything else. Do I want to commit to something like WP? These are some of my concerns for the new year.

Along with some really crazy things happening in my personal life, my writing is still at an all-time low. I’ve tried to motivate myself but it’s a struggle and a long process. I feel like every time I get myself back to a good place mentally, something happens that knocks me right back to my basic foundations. 2018 seemed like one battle after another.

I’ve missed writing. I’ve missed the excitement of filling a blank screen or notebook. I’ve missed the feeling of completion as I found things to change or fix during the editing stages. But it just hasn’t been inside me. There hasn’t even been drive enough for something fun and uncomplicated like a piece of fan fiction to keep me occupied.

However, I have written down ideas and notes whenever something comes to me. It’s just been difficult gathering all the bits into an actual plot. So there’s that.

Also, in the past few days, I’ve had some promising ideas that will flesh out some of my projects that have been on the back burner for years. I don’t think I can put into words how much happiness that has brought me; just being able to focus enough and let the ideas come to me once again. Maybe it’s the super moon, or something. :)

Cross-blogged on my tumblr.

Inspiration, Vindication and Being Okay with Your Own Voice

7/7/14

A couple of weeks ago, I bought a book that I have been meaning to read since forever. "The Left Hand of Darkness." I may have mentioned before how much I love Ursula K. Le Guin. I find her work, fiction or otherwise, interesting and inspiring. Her work pulls me in and captivates me. And almost always she punches me in the heart guts by the end of the story. That's always a bonus.

It is somewhat fortunate that I picked up this book. Almost seeming at just the right time in my life.

While there is a similar element in this book as the one I am writing, it is a completely different idea. I noticed though that my personal style (certain elements that I was worried would be no-no's in the publishing world) are similar to things Le Guin does in her own writing. It made me feel vindicated, in a way. The way she told the story made complete sense. I didn't feel less drawn in or that it was lazy writing, or even overdone in some parts.

This took a lot of worry away from me. I feel refreshed and ready to do even more, go places in my writing where I was afraid to earlier. I need to remember to not be so afraid of what others think. Of "what sells." Just tell my story. Tell my characters' stories. To hell with boundaries put in place. They don't matter. Only telling the tale matters.

I need to remember to not be so afraid.

Well, Hello There!

01/04/14

Yes, yes. I know. It has been a bit since I last wrote.

Many a thing has happened within the silence. Most of it not so exciting. Anyway--

Happy New Year!

I hope everyone had a safe and happy holiday and a great beginning to the new year. My holiday was good, my new year not so much. Some personal things happened. We experienced a death in my family. All we can do is help each other grieve and remember our loved ones. I am not an overly superstitious person, but I am worried that this will be a flavor of the coming year. All I can do is keep, keepin' on.

I am getting back into the swing of things again. I know, I say that a lot. Finished another chapter just a few hours ago. I can't wait to get this all finished so I can cut all the fat.

Hope to see you all around!

Real Life Crazy Times, Progress and Writing Amnesia--Oh My!

7/28/13

So much has been happening since last I wrote. What was it, the end of April? Well, May started off normally, however... It's not really a big secret that I'm from Oklahoma so I'll just say May ended in chaos for those that have been following the news or are familiar with the term "Tornado Alley." Thankfully, I wasn't directly affected by the destruction but it hit pretty close and many friends and family weren't so lucky. Then I found out I will get to move back to my old house. Huzzah! You guys don't even know how happy that makes me, well maybe you do if you have had the pleasure of reading my rants on LJ. :p The bad news in all of that is that the tenants who were renting my house completely trashed it. Like, thoroughly turned my sweet home into a crackhouse--broken windows and all. Also, they wouldn't leave. They stayed the whole month of June (without paying rent) and a week of July. We've spent the remaining month trying to clean up their filth and get rid of the flea infestation they caused. It sucked, but the house looks so much better than it did.

Through this all I have been editing, cutting, pasting and rewriting. Also, I have been reading quite a bit. Most of what I've read has helped in the way of what I won't be doing with my own style. :) I'm really excited about the new bits and baubs that are added in now. Monista is so delightfully rounded. Killius has more to do, and I think that will make an even greater impact on readers once that thing happens. I've also been having fun editing out all the superfluous details and imagery. We really don't need to know every single facial expression. Once or twice is fine, but we don't need to be reminded of the color of this character's eyes, do we? That's the fan fic writer in me wanting to overdo it. People who write fan fic yet also are familiar with original works will know what I mean.

I keep experiencing what I like to call "writing amnesia." This is when one looks back over certain things they've written and finds something they added once while editing and think, "Wow, did I write that?" So far, it's mostly been in a good way. I'll go back and see new dialogue I put in for Lu'Bella and the flow of the scene is just so much better, or the completely new scene makes everything more interesting.

I have received over time a few lj messages saying they were recommended AIF through the Slash Pile community and what my plans are for the story. Sorry you missed it the first time, but I am planning on releasing the story again. Just a better version of it. The only other thing I can say is, check here or my lj once in a while to see what I'm doing if you're still interested in my works.

Exile is Not as Fun as People Might Think

1/18/13

Whoa, it's been a bit. By the way, Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

I'm lame.

On the plus side, I can get onto LJ with my netbook so there have been a few more journal updates somewhere. And that's about as good as it got for me recently. When was my last update? Beginning of November? Well, at the end of November my chair broke. The remaining days of November, the ENTIRE month of December (which includes my birthday and my sister finally came home and I saw her face-to-face for the first time in over a year) and to now I have been inside my house. Couldn't go out, have a loner chair that doesn't fit me and basically been a shut-in exile this whole time. Well, at least I have a loner chair, otherwise I would be in bed these weeks.

Thanks, Jupiter.

Didn't get as much writing done as I would have wanted. I dedicated all of my energy to COB just so I would have something to show for these crap couple of weeks.

Oh, oh! I did see something that tickled me into giggles. One of the places I am going to query has a new genre they're interested in. They call it New Adult and, I am not kidding, the criteria fits to the T my story "A Night Like This." I don't know if readers are familiar with that one, but it is my first attempt at not only straight-up romance, but M/M that I ever put to word. It's melodramatic and ridiculous. Meh, what can I say? It was written as a gift. It made me laugh because, really, people actually want that? *giggles* I guess it's not really surprising, what with "50 Shades..." taking the literary world by storm.

My life has been dullsville lately so that's about it. I think Monday--FINALLY--I get my chair back. I'll get to leave my house, stimulate my brain and come home with an urge to write. I'm feeling really good about the changes I've made. I completely rewrote a few chapters, adding things that should have been addressed and giving Spooky and Dane more interaction and conflict and I'm making Killius and Garenet more rounder and less cookie-cutter. That's important due to events that happen in the sequels. Yep, quite happy about what's going on.

That's it for now. See you on the flip-side!

Just Say, "Yo!"

11/2/12

I'm not doing NaNoWriMo. What I will be doing is something I like to call, "I Am Going to Work on Every Damn Story I Have Unfinished!!!!11" Catchy huh? This is a grab-bag of a whole bunch of pieces, containing COB all the way to the nearly-finished-but-I-gave-up Whore Academy. It won't, however, include any tidbit that belongs to the realm of fan fiction. So I have the remainder of this month to get so many things worked along further or even finished. It's awesome and I'm having fun.

Oh! I am going to try and post a few bits and baubs that are basically short stories and drabbly companion pieces. That Tovin story I asked readers about? I have a solid idea now and am going to finally see about putting it to word. The latest from Lyre Westreach? Almost in the bag.

Out

Oops...

10/31/12

So, I haven't updated this since, what, August? My bad, guys, my bad. I have not been idle though. I've been trying to keep busy and write. Sometimes I'm ultra successful, and other times I play Sims... I really should try and keep up with journaling, It does help me get in the mood. I'm just so used to thinking this thing is only for the Serious Biz.

Oh, speaking of, I figured out why LJ won't work. I Googled it even. Apparently, Hughes Net is known for not being able to handle Live Journal. It is one of a few sites, if not the only one, that this provider simply cannot access. It basically locks you out of your profile. Seriously.

Yeah, so there's that.

Oh, also, HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!!!!!!!!!!! This is one of my favorite, if not most favorite, times of the year. Hope everyone has a safe and happy time tonight. OMG, there's even a full moon!

Writing is coming along well, but I think I'll wait until tomorrow or so to go into all that. This post was mainly to serve as a check-in. Know that something awesome has occurred with COB and I will tell you guys soon. No, it's not getting published. I'm still hacking away and fleshing it out as we speak, but it's still a pretty awesome it of news (well, it is to me.)

Out.

All Right, Well, I Guess I'll Put My Things Here...

7/31/2012

Hey there, little blog o' mine! I swear I've been doing things since last we spoke, writing even. :P There were a few times I even attempted journaling, however, since it didn't much pertain to writing or current projects I felt the need to keep the pleasure off my Serious Business blog. Let's just scratch that idea, shall we? Livejournal, I love you, bubby, but you keep toying with me. I guess I'll just do my thing here. :(

So, what's been up with me? Lots! Some of it not so fun. I had my two nephews since May to the beginning of July, I was in a sort of exile/house arrest because I finally was getting a new chair (yay!) but the loner they gave me kept me for doing anything outside my abode for a month (boo!) Finally received my shnazzy new chair (all terrain, mang!) But then I couldn't clear the door in my van. Got that fixed last week. Then I started feeling wonky and went to the doctor. Turns out I had a severe UTI. Woo!

No... I am not even making any of this shit up.

This summer has been dumb, plain and simple. I've barely felt inspired, let alone the drive to write. I have done a little, but really I've given more energy to not going insane. I am hoping the remaining summer and the blessed coming of fall bears more fruit. Juicy, juicy fruit of labour.

Out

What's Up, Good-Lookin'?

4/21/2012

Finishing COB? Yeah... I'll do it on the night... Oh! But I did take care of that pesky hetero-impotence! You won't believe it, but I totally got back into that vibe by basically writing fan fiction. *accomplished grin* I think it was because I didn't have to try and get into the head of an original character. I already knew their motivations and what now. Not wasting brain power made it easier to play with emotions and scenarios.

I have done a bit more with COB. It's been awesome adding and cutting. I feel good about the changes. I was thinking sometime I'll put a snippet of a new scene up here and show you guys.

I've thought of some awesome ideas. And when I say that, I mean awe-some. Hopefully I can write up some scenarios soon that go along with it.

This was just to check in. 

Out.

An Odd Thing

2/28/12

I have yet to post the new short story. If you follow my paper trail at all you won't be surprised by this admission as it is not on Fiction Press or Adult Fan Fiction. I still plan to share since I don't think anyone online really knows my "Heather" work (aka the hetero stuff haha.) The reason it's not up yet is because I'm not satisfied with it. Yes, I know this is just a blurb from a bigger universe and most likely won't even be in the larger work, but still...

I've come to some startling revelations about myself. I think I have "lost" my connection to hetero characters. Give me asexual and homosexual any day but try hetero? I sometimes find myself at a loss now for what these characters might think and feel when being intimate or pursuing a love interest. It's all very strange. It's not like I am a heterophobe, believe me, that's not the case at all *lecherous grin* but when it comes to romantic elements in writing, and it is between men and women, I seem to be all hands. A curious situation. I am blaming some current trends in literature. Every time I read something now it seems I roll my eyes or am left deeply unsatisfied by those elements. It makes me not want to do it in my own writing. Does that make sense? Probably not, but there you are.

It May Seem Silent

So, AIF is completed on Fiction Press and Adult Fan Fiction. Now what?

Well, I will finish uploading the two other Lyre stories and I think I'll throw the Narcissus story up there as well, just for the fun of it. Meanwhile, I will be editing and querying. It might seem like I drop off the face of the Internet, but I assure you, I'll be here. Whenever I have some breaking news, I'll be sure to post. If you're more curious than that you can check out my non-writer blog on Live Journal, my name is socky_mojo there. Should warn you though, I've had to up security on that and now it's friends-only. Or it should be... Check it, if you care to: http://socky-mojo.livejournal.com/

Wow, apparently someone does read this! :) Yes, there are sequels planned and new ideas to be made. Stick around!

Happy New Year!

S Novym Godom! <-- That's me saying Happy New Year in Russian, but with English-speakers in mind. :P

Hey look! I updated before the end of the year! Huzzah!

I am getting a lot of editing done. Woo! I'm going to be writing too, as soon as I update this and my lj, if it lets me on. Mayhaps the coming year will be awesome and productive since I am being awesome and somewhat productive right now.

See you guys on the flip-side!